Stars

Humid Roads
Drenched in rain

Random keystrokes
Struggling thoughts

Blanketing my gloom
Awakening from my tomb

Squeezing my heart
Yearning for a new start

Please don't say it to me
I am slain and set free

Blue skies
Beautiful eyes

Heavy breath
Unknown depth

Tiny bright dots
Only your thoughts

Why?

Why do I feel that I am alone?

Why do I choke in a heavy tone?

It boiled down to a simple idiosyncrasy

It has always been an egocentric tyranny

Is it always the storm before the calm?

Or vice versa the norm?

Why do I yearn for a tear drop?

Why do I always need to get to the top?

I still want to lose myself in your serene eyes

I still want to be noticed in this world full of lies

Sunday

A Sunday evening filled with more morose
I wish I had you in a limited dose

I don’t know what to do
Fly away or wait in my blue

My thoughts soaring higher than heavens
Knowing no difference between cookoos and ravens

I wish I had someone who knows how it feels
I wish I had you to burst into a million peals

Dry barren lands beyond horizons
Hurting more than a thousand poisons

I still have the envelope without a note
Waiting for the message that you never wrote

Water

During my undergrad days I had a chance to set questionnaire for the prelims of Personality Contest. One of the questions was to write something about water. I really enjoyed reading all the answers. Today when I am thinking about water, I wished I had those answers.

Answers and questions....they make life so much fun. Well....before I stray too far away from the topic I'll get back to the topic which I wanted to write about. Water is a fascinating concept. It is interesting in so many ways. It is innocent when it takes the shape of a drop. Drop, it seems helpless and alone and naive but the same drop can represent so many things. It may be someone's desperation, someone's perspiration, someone's inspiration, someone's jubiliation, someone's motivation or it can be anything that may not be rhyming with these words.

Same water when it takes the shape of ocean can intimidate you with all its enormisity and magnanimity. Ocean can intimidate you but if you really think about it, it is filled with so much of peace and contentment. It almost feels harmless and soothing.

Water also comes in the form of waves on the shores. Waves are one more interesting phenomenon, whenever they rush to the shore and collapse back it seems as if they are pondering themselves with a lot of questions seeking answers from the shores. It may be that shores are frustrated with questions and when they confront waves with them, waves just collape in order to not break open a secret. Well, secrets...secrets deep inside the ocean which cannot be revealed. These waves rise and collapse a million times but they will never reveal the secret. Persistence? I don't know, may be....but who is more persistent? Shores? or the Waves? It is fun if some issues are not resolved forever...

Inertia.

The tendency of a body at rest to remain at rest or of a body in motion to stay in motion in a straight line unless acted on by an outside force. That's how its defined in physics.

Well, right now it seems that life is in such phase. Inertia seems to not end. Akhele hu, pata nahi ki mai kisi ke intezaar mein hu ya kisi intezaar ke intezaar mein. Baithe hu saalon se, koi mere darwaza khat khataya nahin. Kabhi kabhi lagta hain ki I like my lonliness and I am scared of my lonliness lest I lose it. Jab main apne khwabon mein khojaata hu meri tanhayi dastak karke ehsaas dilaata hain ki main akhele nahin hun. Jab main intezaar ke baare main soch tha hun tho, mere zehen main aise kuch sawal uth the hain ki zindagi ko maut ka intezaar hain ki maut ko zindagi ko. Kisi na kisi ko intezaar hain. Mera intezaar ek dastak ka, ek muskurahat ka, ek dard ka, ek waada ka, ek khwaab ka.

Platform

Well, I was listening to Gulzar reminding Pancham about the time when they used to wait on the railway tracks. This started me thinking. We hear a lot about comparision between trains and life, it lead me to a few ponderings.

Are we travelling in a train to find our destination? or Are we waiting for the right train to arrive? Whatever may be the case, interesting part is that its fun to be a part of it.

If we are inside the train, its fun to eagerly wait for an unknown companion whose company may be fun or not as much fun, we don't know know how long the companionship will last. Its possible that either of us may find our destinations before other and one of us need to wait longer possibly to find another passenger or reach our stop to end the journey.

If we are waiting on the platform we may be waiting for the right train to arrive. Most of my experince is on Indian platforms so we can be kept waiting till eternity for the train to arrive. At times you will be in the station but you may still miss the train because you were late by minutes or on the wrong platform. Sometimes we don't need to wait or check the schedule, we are at the right place in right time to get right train.

But what about those who came to station only to realise that they like where they are and their journey seem to have ended even before it started?

PS: Talking about trains, I didn't travel much by trains but used to go to railway station to see off friends. I used hate Narsapur express like hell.

Liberation

I got into my car and heard Ms Mudgal singing away in all her glory about rain. When I looked around, it seemed as if the whole place is fresh after a brief shower. When I moved a few hundredyards, I saw some blue bells and those trees draped in colorful capes. Talking about these blue bells, I have been noticing them fo past two days and even thought about 'capturing' them in my camera. Being a procastinator that I am, I just wasted. I thought about it and started smiling. I thought it is good to procastinate sometimes. I liberated them !! I never captured them, essentially I liberated them!!

Yeah right!!